As stoners ourselves here at S.A., we know how important it is to have good munch ready when you meet Mary Jane.
So to all of our friends and readers here is part one of our 100 Best munchies food of 2019. As we were munching at the time of writing this, we found it very hard to put the food on the list in any particular order as each snack we thought of seemed equally good.
Anyway, thanks to over 20 years of combined weed smoking here at S.A., we believe our crew has come up with a relatively reasonable and relatable list. Enjoy!
25) Haribo Starmix
All of us working here knew we needed some kind of gummy sweet on the list. But which ones? What else could it be but Haribo Starmix. We chose this selection of gummies as there is something in the bag for everyone no matter what their taste. Plus nothing is better than wearing edible rings and eating tiny eggs when you’re stoned.
24) Chicago Town Deep Dish Pizza
When you’re stoned what do you always want? Pizza.
When you are stoned, what is the one thing you don’t have? Time to sit around making a pizza in the oven.
Solution? Chicago town’s excellent 3-minute microwave pizzas.
23) Mighty Mexican Bowl
Legend has it that this culinary classic dates back to the early Mayan Empire. It is quite possibly one of the most iconic stoner dishes and is one that every stoner has at some point made, no doubt. It is what you get when you melt cheese, nachos, and salsa together in the microwave. Usually topped with guacamole or jalapeños this dish always hits the spot, just make sure nobody takes the cheesiest chip.
22) Bakery Section Cookies
No matter where you live most supermarkets are filled with hungry stoners, and probably because of this, most supermarkets offer freshly made hand made cookies. These things are usually super soft, chewy and downright incredible. So much so that even stoners who only snack on savories often can’t resist a bite.
While PB&J is most people’s go-to snack when munching, all too many people forget about its handsome twin brother, PB&C. PB&C or peanut butter and chocolate is essentially DIY Reese’s buttercups and is the great experience of enjoying a bar of chocolate dipped in a jar of peanut butter after every bite.
20) Nutella Wraps
When baked nothing is worse than crumbs, nothing apart from trying to spread butter on bread without breaking it. That is why wraps were invented, so stoners could spread butter easily and not get covered in crumbs while eating in front of the TV and what better way to fill a wrap than with that soft brown gold we call Nutella. Not only does this taste great (and a lot like a crepe with Nutella) but its probably one of the healthier stoner foods out there.
19) Pimped Cereal
Most of you will agree that not much beats the simplicity of quenching your munchies with a bowl of your favorite cereal. There is something about this simple breakfast food that is just so appealing to stoners, but sometimes it lacks a little something. Luckily, the ingenuity of the stoner never fails, and one day some genius realized that you could modify your cornflakes with anything from biscuits to M&M’s, and anything sweet you could fit into the bowl with the cereal, making any boring old bowl of breakfast look like one of Willy Wonka’s inventions.
18) Beef Jerky
This one might sound like a random entry, but hear us out. When you are stoned, you want something you won’t munch through quickly, something with an unusual but not offputting taste and something you won’t spill all over yourself. If you like jerky (or at the very least don’t dislike it), we recommend trying it stoned as it not only takes a fair bit of chewing to lose its texture and flavor, but this excessive chewing can help with dry-mouth.
We here at stoners academy find this to be one of our staple snacks when we all get together in any group. Super cheap to buy, fun to make and easy to flavor, popcorn is according to ma
ny in the crew, the best munch there is. It’s hard to disagree with them when you consider just how tasty and filling it is at such a low price! The hardest part is deciding how to flavor them, although cinnamon and sugar make for a fantastic treat for those with a sweeter tooth.
16) Cookie Dough
To be honest, we were surprised at how long it took for someone to mention cookie dough when we were planning this article. Such a classic munchies food, cookie dough ticks every right box.
We would recommend none other than Betty Crocker’s Just Add Water Cookie Mix as the texture is perfect and it also contains no raw eggs, meaning no risk, or should we say paranoia, of salmonella. Failing that some places sell ready-made cookie dough sausages which many a stoner has eaten like a sickly chocolate bar.
15) Ben & Jerry’s Chocolate Brownie Ice Cream
Do we need to say any more?
14) Cherry Bakewell Tarts
A crumbly biscuit base filled with jam and topped with chewy icing and a glazed cherry. Yes, this is a real thing, and yes they are as good as they sound. The cherry Bakewell with its soft texture and the sweet cherry/almond taste is enough to make most people weak at the knees.
These are definitely a stoner snack not to eat in public spaces as it is impossible not to groan in pleasure at the first bite.
13) Supermarket Meal Deal
Most supermarkets these days usually have a ‘meal deal’ section where you can get a main, snack and drink for a great value price. It goes without saying how this could appeal to weed-smokers. These deals always vary in what is included in the offer, but when you have the munchies, it isn’t tough to choose something satisfying.
12) Hula Hoops
Out of all the crisps we could have included in this part of the list, we could have gone for Doritos, 3D Twisters, or one of the classics, but there is a crisp which never gets enough attention from the stoner community, this is, of course, the humble Hoola Hoops. These guys, not only taste amazing but also fit snugly onto the tips of your fingers, so you can wear them until you decide to do the oddly satisfying act of biting down on them until they break against your fingers. Crisps you can wear, do we need to say any more?
11) Cheese Toasty
If you were born anytime after the 1970s, you will no doubt, somewhere in your house have one of those toasty machines with the green and red lights on top.
Not only are they quick, but the toasties the machine makes are so tasty that you don’t need to add anything other than just cheese. Not only can you customize your toasty, but when you are baked nothing beats the bits of cheese that ooze out the sides and burn on the machine.
How do they get the cheese so stringy?
10) Pain Au Chocolat
So simple, yet so elegant. The classing pain au chocolate, be it fresh from the bakers or mass-produced from the supermarket nothing is as moorish. No matter what mood you are in, even if you are craving extra savory bacon with added salt, you will always be up for one of these. Once you start on the pain au chocolats, it is hard to stop as their flaky texture allows for countless different ways to eat this treat.
9) KitKat Chunky
What beats four mini chocolate bars stuck together? A giant one that is so rectangular that the chocolate can be removed in 6 satisfying bites. The KitKat Chunky is always a winner in our books, not just because of its unique taste and texture but also because the wafer interior makes it a surprisingly light chocolate bar for its size. The reason a light chocolate bar is beneficial is that it makes it harder to over-munch and feel sick. It was practically built with stoners in mind.
8) Cadbury’s Cream Egg
This is undoubtedly one of the strangest candies ever made. Designed by Cadbury and super popular around Easter, the cream egg is a hollow chocolate egg filled with this hyper-sweet fake egg slime. While this sounds gross, cream eggs are definitely so good that they are one of the easiest snacks to overdose on.
The love affair between the brownie and marijuana is one which goes back thousands of years. Even though it is always fun to make your own brownies for many obvious reasons, we have chosen instead to give love to the humble shop-bought brownie. Now only are these brownies as good as any homemade brownie but they are never dry, always making for a sweet chewy chocolate fix.
6) Pink KitKat
As elusive as a rare Pokemon, this snack is equally satisfying and rewarding to find, offering a chocolate fix unlike anything else. These KitKats are the same as the standard variety, except with one crucial difference, they are made of Ruby Chocolate. The flavor given by this mysterious new class of chocolate is tangy, almost like dried strawberries, and when you are stoned that ever so slightly unusual taste hits the spot nicely.
If you ever want to make everyone in the group happy, you could be the one who takes the plunge and buys a can of Pringles. Any flavor is good, but we all know that Sour Cream & Onion is the best. Not only are they great for sharing, but the lack of air in the tube makes them great value for money. As they say, once you pop you can’t stop.
4) Nutella B-ready
Wafer filled with Nutella. Nutella-filled wafer. You don’t need to be stoned to see how good these are.
3) Granola & Yogurt
If you have not tried this yet, then stop reading now and go get some. Granola, specifically chocolate granola, and yogurt is one of the nicest and surprisingly healthiest things we have ever tried. It not only gives you a great chocolate fix but also has an unusual enough flavor to make it that little bit nicer when high.
2) Mac & Cheese
Even though you can’t enjoy mac and cheese in an overly social environment, the cheesy, creamy, gooey goodness of mac and cheese when stoned is like finding Nirvana.
1) Sticky Cheesy Noodles
Mac and Cheese for people too lazy to wait for the mac to cook. Batchelor’s Super Noodles are a staple student food for many and stoner food for others. They are super easy and quick to make and taste amazing.
How do you perfect noodle perfection? The obvious way, cheese. Adding a little grated cheese to the still-cooking noodles makes them super stringy and just that little bit more flavorful.